Farewell Haphazard

[Buckwalter]

Asylum's favorite Canadian, @HapHazard (that's right Paratus, I said it) retired today.

Hap was Asylum's longest standing admin to date. He's spent countless hours working to improve and maintain the community. He's probably locked more threads than most of us have read. He's always been an affable and reasonable guy to deal with, he's always been fair-minded and seemingly immune to the pettiness and caprice that too often characterize interactions with internet authority figures.

Hap is truly one of the good ones so let's send him off right with fond memories, cherished threads that he locked, and whatever else you feel like including.

 

 I'll start things off with the fact that Hap is currently the subject of Asylum's only, longstanding portmanteau: the haplock. 

@Kowalski made this excellent video which sums up the origin of the term.

 

And even after all these years his post history hasn't changed much 

Aside from Hap's fondness for locking threads, he also holds the record for either the best or worst jet landing in Asylum history, managing to basically ram into a pile of garbage, Jigawatt's helicopter, and the ground, yet he still managed to survive. 

 

He's also super Canadian. By searching for "Maple Syrup" in discord, Haphazard's name pops up more than a dozen times, including at least two stories about an $18,000,000 maple syrup heist. 

Anyway, Hap, it's been an absolutely pleasure buddy. All the best. o7

 

[Scott]

Who will lock all the retarded posts now? 

[Sheriff Rick Grimes]

Well shit.  

[Trilligy]

Only person I know who left to get a ethernet cable and came back with a new truck. T.T

[Scott]

7 minutes ago, Trilligy said:

Only person I know who left to get a ethernet cable and came back with a new truck. T.T

ooh but what kind of truck @HapHazard

[heater]

lmfao this was funny af good shit.

[HapHazard]

12 minutes ago, Scott said:

Who will lock all the retarded posts now? 

Don't worry, i didn't turn in my Lock. haha

[Axe]

Just now, HapHazard said:

Don't worry, i didn't turn in my Lock. haha

Lock is capitalized

God is capitalized in the bible

Lock = God Confirmed  

[Emma]

I'm surprised he hasn't Locked this yet...  That'd be his final farewell

Edited March 15, 2017 by Patrick James
Changed locked to Locked as per Axe

[KevinOB]

Thanks for everything 

[Lorax]

Just now, Patrick James said:

I'm surprised he hasn't Locked this yet...  That'd be his final farewell

If we derail this thread he'll have to lock it!

[Buckwalter]

Just now, Lorax said:

If we derail this thread he'll have to lock it!

haha after everyone says their goodbyes you can force Hap to lock it. But give it a couple of days first please.

[Axe]

Spoiler

SO WHOSE THE BEST GANG ON ASYLUM? ALSO APD NEEDS 9.3MM BECAUSE REBEL OP. ALSO ADMIN ABOOSE. BANNED FOR NO REASON. SPAWNING IN GEAR DESTROY BOUNTY HUNTER. REMOVE CSAT SCRIPT. DEVS ARE SHIT

 

This should get it Locked  

[Mr Smirnoff]

@HapHazard is a legend! He was even back when I became an admin! 

 

@Buckwalter this would go perfectly with shooting stars meme 

[Axe]

37 minutes ago, Buckwalter said:

portmanteau

Also... What a fucking word. Buckwalter literally best wordsmith NA. Curse your better understanding of the English langauge. 

[HapHazard]

1 minute ago, Axe said:

Also... What a fucking word. Buckwalter literally best wordsmith NA. Curse your better understanding of the English langauge. 

The amount of words we had to look up when Buckwalter would post something in Admin chat to figure out what he meant is way too high. lol

[Axe]

And that post history is misleading and photoshopped.

@Buckwalter is fake news. This can't be trusted. He's the failing Asylum Times

This must all be fake. We're being pranked  

[TheRealLethal]

thanks for vacating an admin spot for me hap. When do i get debug console?      (in all seriousness, thanks for putting up with the developmentally disabled asylum community for so long)

[Buckwalter]

1 minute ago, Axe said:

And that post history is misleading and photoshopped.

@Buckwalter is fake news. This can't be trusted. He's the failing Asylum Times

This must all be fake. We're being pranked  

To be clear, that's not his raw post history, I just searched for "locked" by author "Haphazard." haha so I'm a little bit fake news but it got the point across didn't it?

[Mitch (IFRIT)]

Thanks Hap! Im just south of you up there. have a great time with this new found free time. 

[Mitch (IFRIT)]

Not my video, but found this gold on the tube. 

[HapHazard]

@(IFRIT)Mitch That's a blast from the past, good times, I still remember this chase tbh. lol

[Mitch (IFRIT)]

Just now, HapHazard said:

@(IFRIT)Mitch That's a blast from the past, good times, I still remember this chase tbh. lol

You're known to be the voice of reason! The part that made me chuckle is when you asked if he was alone in his heli. 

[Axe]

13 minutes ago, (IFRIT)Mitch said:

Not my video, but found this gold on the tube. 

Mr Killaalot  Wasn't that the guy DDOSing the servers when he got caught? Something like that. Im not crazy right? 

[massi]

No more haplocks?

[Mitch (IFRIT)]

1 hour ago, HapHazard said:

Don't worry, i didn't turn in my Lock. haha

 

Just now, massi said:

No more haplocks?

 

[Hanzo/Dirty Scrubz]

Take care Hap, I remember running into you as a BH when we captured you at Rebel outpost and chopped your Orca. You were super chill then and a good example of how I wish most people interacted with each other on Asylum. 

[HapHazard]

Just now, Hanzo/Dirty Scrubz said:

Take care Hap, I remember running into you as a BH when we captured you at Rebel outpost and chopped your Orca. You were super chill then and a good example of how I wish most people interacted with each other on Asylum. 

I was super Salty on the inside. lol.

I've always tried to be super chill in all my interactions, and not try to force people to "respect" my authority, except of course in certain situations when its needed. I've always been a strong believer of Earning peoples respect rather then Demanding it, and tried my best to do so during my time as an admin.

[The Monopoly Man]

He is the hero that we need, but not the one that we deserve.

[Axe]

1 hour ago, The Monopoly Man said:

 

He is the hero that we need, but no one wants

FTFY

[HapHazard]

3 minutes ago, Axe said:

FTFY

Rude

[Axe]

Just now, HapHazard said:

Rude

It was just a joke 

Never forget

 

[HomeTrlx]

Ayyy lmao. O7 Hap hope you gonna have a great time.

 

 

#HapLock

[NugsOfChronic]

Thanks for all the work hap! 

[Gaskal]

@HapHazard o7 you are the best franch i ever meet 

 

i will miss you buddy i hope you have amazing time 

Edited March 15, 2017 by Gaskal

[Heidelberg]

o7 buddy.

[BaDaBiNg_10-8]

Candy land Bitch, ❤️ o7.

[HotWings]

Send me some maple syrup and whiskey from the retirement home.

[Sergey Shoygu]

@HapHazard are you still gonna be roasting me  while being a retired admin you cuck 

[HapHazard]

22 minutes ago, Sergey Shoygu said:

@HapHazard are you still gonna be roasting me  while being a retired admin you cuck 

That's a no brainer question. The answer is obviously yes.